thinking back

lately i have been thinking back at the past couple years... friends i made, friends ive lost and for silly reasons. And quite frankly it makes me sad. i wish i could still go to them for things like advice or just to say hi. i still wonder how they are and hope life is treating them well. We are all in the same but yet different parts of our life. And they were once there for me so often its weird to think that they never will be again. its odd how things work out.. or not? i mean... i guess it all depends on how you look at things. 

i know i know things are in the past for a reason.... but that doesnt mean you have to forget about them completely. Especially if things were at one time, fun and great. but i mean i guess it is what it is. 

what can ya do!? 

God Bless! 

happy birthday

today is my husbands birthday and he is spending it in korea. i wasnt able to send him his birthday gifts today, as i am still shopping for him and just got his address. i know he is having a rather hard time being away, thats understandable...him and i have gone threw this before but he has never had to do this with wesley til now. im sure in no time with skype and phone calls and plenty of pictures of wesley it will get easier!

on a better note i got to send rob a video of wesley taking his first steps on robs birthday! what a great gift! i was thrilled that i was able to get that and wesley was able to do that for his daddy on his birthday! he is growing so incredibly fast, i cant even believe it!

Happy birthday hubby/daddy!

ive started work, at victoria's secret, i really like it. The ladies are nice and make the work place fun! Plus its different from anything else i have done, so far. its going great though, i enjoy it! i am still working on my photography, slowly but surely as of now, just having family and friends model for me so i can get some practice in, but hopefully some day will make that a job for myself as well!

i cant believe that next month my babyboy will be one year old! gosh how time flies.

time to go.

God Bless

the now

i have officially said bye to my fort campbell life, though it was a littler bittersweet, i was happy to be going home.. i just wish rob didnt have to go back to korea..

but as of right this minute i am busy living in the now... with my husband having to leave for korea in a few short weeks i am doing all i can with him and our baby boy. tons of hanging out with his family and mine along with doing us time. I am cherishing every minute. Im also giving rob and baby wesley plenty of time to just do guy days and hangout with each other, he will soon be missing out on that, sadly.

We had baby boys early 1st birthday party saturday so that rob would be here for it he had a great turn out! And he got to some cool gifts! The best part was watching him dig into his birthday cake! My dad came up from florida to ump and spend some time with us all so we've been meeting up with him when we can.

I renewed my license today but will have to again soon to have my married name on it since we forgot to take our marriage certificate with us (and my military id and social security card wasnt enough) but i HAD to get it done today for my orientation for work. - i got a job at victoria secrets! yay!!

well that is all i have for now!

God Bless!

stopping time

sometimes i wish there were a way to stop time, or just a least slow it wayyyy down. im not ready to start packing to move. im not ready to start planning my babyboys first birthday. im not ready to say goodbye to my husband as he leaves for yet another year in korea. to much all at once. and of course they are all pretty huge. moving- huge. first birthday- huge. korea- huge.

im just hoping all goes well. hoping that korea only makes us stronger and better than ever. hoping that wesleys birthday goes great and as planned. hoping that moving goes smooth.

as much as i want time to stop i must go with the flow because, well..life goes on. so for now we are just enjoying every day together and doing what we have to do.

short, sweet and to the point.

God Bless!

big little

Our little boy is getting soooo big. I really cant get over how fast he is growing and i love that i get to watch every minute of it and be here to help him grow. Today he was holding onto the coffee table and walked toward his snacks like a big boy. The past few days when we get him from bed in the morning he has been standing up and playing with his cars mobile that spins over his bed. He likes to play in his cars ball pit as well. He has become quite the crawling machine, and he likes to pull himself up on anything that he can. We are currently working on baba, byebye, dada, mum. Hes getting there! i don't think it'll be too much longer. I'm excited for whats to come, i love watching him learn new things and seeing the excitement on his face. 

Speaking of new things Baby Wesley had his first Easter!! His grandma got him a basket with some goodies in it and a toy truck in he, he also got to try his first peep. 

Then the Easter bunny got him a stuffed bunny, snacks- yogurt bites and little puffs, bubbles, mega chalk and fun chalk holders that look like bugs.

On Easter we took Wesley to see the Easter bunny in Nashville at bass pro shops, they were doing free Easter bunny pictures and gave us something to do. The Easter bunny wasn't allowed to touch the children so we had to be in the picture as well, which i was okay with.. didn't bother US any. It was funny when we say down Wesley had a huge smile on his face when he looked at the Easter bunny, but once they got the camera out he stopped. HAHA.

live&learn

so I've come to realize that trying doesn't always mean succeeding...trying can often lead to failure. which doesn't feel good to anyone. I'm going to discuss a situation where i tried and failed. (this isn't too recent, its just been on my mind lately)
...i tried to be the bigger person and put the past behind me, come to find out putting the past behind me was just allowing it to bite me IN the behind. i wanted to better myself and teach my child (though he doesnt understand now, but would at some point) that you cannot and should not hold grudges, sometimes its just a big misunderstanding on both ends and you just need to sit down and talk it out. Well..sometimes being the bigger person doesn't always give you the gratitude you thought it would. Sometimes it makes things worse which in this case it did. I tried to let go of all that had happened and move on but after a while i realized that the other person did not seem fully ready. I had a lot going on at the time, Husband found out he had orders and babyboy and i would be moving back home. I had both of their appointments to go to, and worry about and i had recently started babysitting for a little boy the same age as my son. So i was just taking myself out off all possible stressful / drama situations and doing what i had to do for me. Taking care of my family and another persons child, trying to bring in an income and not have to pay out the butt for childcare, it was a win-win situation. Well while trying to be the bigger person i lost a friend, which sucked. Then me and the person i was trying to mend broken bridges with had a falling out. It was silly really, and handled very immaturely on their part, but i guess in the heat of the moment...crap happens. At the moment i was rather upset for losing a friend and failing to rekindle another. But as of now i feel like it still sucks to lose a friend but theres nothing i can do. I just have to live and learn. I've much too much going on at the moment, husband still having physical therapy on his foot, and babyboys appointments and well being, not to forget i have to care for myself as well. And not to mention the stress of having to move and knowing that our son and i are moving one way while the husband/father is moving to the other side of the world.

Point of the story...you live and you learn...and everything happens for a reason.


God Bless

age is but a number

In many cases I hear people saying that I have a lot to learn due to the fact that I am younger than they are, but to me age is but a number...age has nothing to due with what you have yet to learn or not.. you learn by living, and that's what I do. I feel maturity also has nothing to do with age. You learn as you grow and you grow when you learn. No two people are the same... I know people older than I that are a lot more immature than I am but I also know people younger than me that are more mature than I am. It happens, but one thing I hate is when people judge maturity by age. For no matter what I do I try my best and I strive for the best in all things. I may fall every now and then but you can bet your bottom dollar that I pick myself back up and dust myself off and keep going, sometimes it takes me longer than others but I get it done. Right or wrong or indifferent it doesn't matter I will always be the type to try to be the better person in all things. Truth is I'm going to be 21 on the 19th of May, sometimes I feel much older and sometimes I feel younger, it all just depends I guess. I'm not going to lie I'm young I make mistakes but show me someone who hasn't.. I will always try to right my wrongs and move forward and learn from my mistakes, and really that's all one can do.

well its getting late and i have some picking up to do..

Good Night
&
God Bless!