N.B.P.M

Im sure you are wondering what N.B.P.M stands for...well let me tell you- National Bullying Prevention Month. Yup welcome to October, bullying prevention awareness month!

Bullying is something that 99% of us have all endured at some point in our lives, whether we like to admit it or not. I will be the first to say that i have been on both ends of bullying...not so much that i did the bullying myself but i sat there and watched people get bullied in fear that if i spoke up it would turn around and be directed towards me.  Needless to say i have been bullied quite a bit in my life, about things like my big eyes, or my clothing choice when i was younger, to my size - height and weight and so much more.

Well here is what i say to that...We all have our own story, and i am not about to let somebody write mine for me!

When i was in 4th grade people would make fun of me for two things..one was the size of my eyes people would walk around saying "shut your eyes" the reason being that they said my eyes were creepy because they were so big. Honestly if you would ask me whats one thing i like about myself i would say my eyes, i like that they are big, i always have!  Another thing i would get made fun of for was my clothing choice..not that i really had a choice i was small i was wearing a 6x in 4th grade, and when your wearing clothes that small your options are limited to little mermaid (that was one of the outfits i would get picked on for wearing) and things like that.

Then middle school came around, and i got picked on for my size. People would pick on me for my height whcih didnt really bug me because there is nothing i could have possibly done to change my height. People would pick on me for my weight they would call me anorexic, even my close friends would. Some had even called my mom and told her that they thought i was anorexic and that she should do something about it. I was a cheerleader in middle school and playing basketball and softball i was active, i didnt do anything unhealthy in order to be small. I have always been a small girl, i cant help it no matter how hard i try.

Then came high school, nothing more than the usual things..but i was mainly picked on for one thing and that would be my size...here we go again with the anorexic comments. But by this time i had heard it all through middle school and now high school too..Well at this point i had heard it enough and i had really started letting it get to me. I started to think that maybe all these anorexic comments were people slick way of telling me i was fat, although i really knew i wasnt...my mind had a sick way of tricking myself..i stopped eating breakfast and skipping lunch then eating just a little for dinner if i ate at all. Or i would skip breakfast and eat lunch so my friends wouldnt say anything about me not eating then skip dinner. Then it got to where i was getting bad headaches everyday so then my mom had me log what i was eating so i started eating more again thinking that was the reason for my headaches well it didnt cure them so i quickly went back to my old habbits..then i even started thinking what if i just ate then later made my self purge maybe then i would feel a little better because id be eating and not having a hedache at school. Well that thought quickly passed for i knew i didnt have it in me to make myself get sick plus i dont enjoy throwing up so there was no way i was about to do that to myself.  then i met rob he knew what i was doing as far as not eating goes we started dating and he started talking to me about being good to yourself no matter what others say and think..it doesnt matter as long as i am happy with me. He would ask me when the last time i ate was and i would be honest he wouldnt hold back, he would tell me i was stupid and i needed to treat myself better than i was. Then he soon started to call me or text me after every meal to make sure i ate he would ask when i ate what i ate and how much. Most would think that was annoying but i didnt it was nice to me, he was showing me that he cared and wasnt just going to turn his back on what i was doing. He was determined to help me, and to make me want to help myself!

Looking back now i realize that was dumb of me to let people get to me on that level. I wasnt helping myself i was only hurting myself. But im glad i have had such strong people to help pick me back up when i fall!

I have recently heard a few similar stories to these from a few other whom i am close to, it really hits ya hard when it happens to others so close! When i heard what was going on it broke my heart, and i instantly wanted to help! Right now i am working on making some hoodies (since it is hoody weather now) to help spread awareness to bullying! If you are interested in one they are $36 plus shipping, (since i am designing them online.) just message me on here or facebook and ill let you know how you too can help spread awareness! They are simple and to the point!

You hear of cases like demi lovatos- a famous disney star/singer, you look at her and what she has gone through and you look at what she turned to as a quick release and your shocked and wonder what this world has come to..how could such a young girl feel like that was the only way to turn. - So many others have turned to that same thing and them some for that same reason- BULLYING! So lets help put a stop to it! Like i said before We all have our own story, please dont let somebody write yours for you!



"Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life, but define yourself." - Harvey S. Firestone


God Bless!

mending broken bridges

so recently i have decided to mend a few broken bridges from my past..one from back home and one from here in Kentucky.  I'm just over all the things that have gone on and been said. So i have come clean to them about what went on and why. I just felt like it was something i needed to do. There comes a time in your life when you wake up and realize that life is too short to be holding grudges and causing drama and whatever other negative things that may be going on in your life. I just wanted to be-able to write the past as the past and move on with my life. I was done wondering and worrying. I felt like i owed and deserved an explanation for what had gone on between me and those two people. Its not always easy being the bigger person and admitting your wrong but sometimes that's just what needs to be done in order to feel better about things. Sometimes it may just all be a big misunderstanding. I'm the type of person that tends to care tooo much about things i don't like when people are sad or mad at me or about anything else for that matter. I just want to be everyone's friend and get along and be happy. i don't want to some day look back and wonder what if i had done things differently, so i did what i thought i had to do! And i feel better for doing so. im sure things were said on both ends but ya know what i don't care anymore its in the past and i am over it! I've got great friends and an awesome family, both here and back home so im happy. There is no need to dwell on the past when the future looks so great!

Not to long ago i mended a bridge that i had broken a while ago with another good friend from here. Her and i had a falling out, i honestly don't remember what it was over nor do i really care for i have put that all behind me...we started talking and all not long before she had her baby girl, and might i said i am so glad that we did. She was the first person i had met here, our husbands are good friends, and we have quite a bit in common. And i absolutely adore her sweet little girl, and so does baby Wesley!

God Bless!

welcome to motherhood

Being a mother has completely changed my life, for the better. Ive never felt so much love! I truly believe this is what i was born to do..to be a mother!

I know i know ive only been a mother for a couple days shy of 4 weeks now but so far its been ok. I can tell that being a mother has changed me and is making me grow up to be a bigger and better person. I no longer feel the need to be up to date on all the latest gossip (although i am a girl so of course i dont mind hearing a little here and there...but it no longer consumes my life). I don't feel the need to always be out doing something, im perfectly ok with just hanging out at home with my little family. I no longer get upset or grumpy if i am awaken through out the night..or made to wake up early, for i know my motherly duties and i am all for them. I am the one that brought this little man into the world and i know it is my responsibility to get up with him and feed him and change him and bathe him, and to love and take care of him. and i couldn't be happier in doing so! And i am glad i do not have it do it on my own, having my husband there to help me makes it that much better and easier, not to mention i just love seeing him with our little man! It melts my heart to watch him interact with Wesley!

Back to motherhood... you can definitely tell your a mother when you realize you forgot a burp rag and are okay with using one of your favorite or new tops to clean spit up off your little ones face. or when it doesnt completely gross you out when your changing your babies diaper and end up getting poop on your hand. Or like if you see they have a little booger in their nose and theres no tissue or nose sucker in reach and your okay with picking their nose. lol. Its kind of funny if you think about it .. if that would have happened anytime before with any other child it probably would have grossed me out- at least just a little, but its my child so im okay with it. I would and will do anything for this little guy so to me all of that is really no big deal.

if you have kids im sure you understand and if you dont im sure one day you will!


cuddle time, man i really dont want my little bear to grow up i just love these little moments soo much!

God bless!

living life

My son is living a pretty full life already for only being 3 weeks and 3 days old! First of all WOW i cant believe my baby is almost 4 weeks old!! But...i also cannot believe He has been to three concerts already...
         1. Kip Moore
         2. Kelly Clarkson
         3. Uncle Kracker
What in the world, im 20 and my son has seen one less concert than i have..whats up with that?! Even though i know he wont remember them and he has no clue who they are im glad we are able to do things like that as a family - me his daddy and him. They were all free concerts so we figured why not go!? Although the kip moore concert was rather disappointing. The other two on the other hand, they were really pretty good!

Off topic a little bit but today marks 3 years of my husband being in the Army..3 down & 2 to go! So far it hasnt been bad, lets hope it stays that way.

Well its time to go feed my little bear!

sorry my blogs are sooo short these days, i just love spending time with my little family!


God Bless!

Welcome Baby Wesley

we would like to welcome our baby boy! 

WESLEY JOSEPH 

7 lbs 4 oz, 20.5 inches long 

                                

We went in for me to be induced on Wed August 22, at 9:30 am. And Wesley was born at 4:33 am Thursday morning - August 23, 2012. Everything went smoothly though it took its time, baby was healthy along with myself! I honestly could not have asked for a better pregnancy and delivery, everything just went soooo well!! I had my mom and of course my husband in the delivery room with me, they were such a good help i could not have done it without their amazing support! 

 Our lives have changed, only for the better. We couldnt be happier with life right now! I absolutely love my little family. 

Time to go cuddle with my hubby and baby boy!! 

God bless!! 

Good news

well today i had a stress test and a check up. The stress test went well, along with my check up. The checked to see if i was dilated at all and i was at a fingertip - so not much at all. So i figured great its going to be a while still til i have my sweet little baby boy in my arms. Not that my pregnancy was bad or anything im just getting anxious for our little bear to get here!!

Well at the end of the apt my ob said she thought she had some good news, rob asked what the news was and she said well we have an induction date for you.. robs eyes lite up as he heard that and we asked when it was for she said the 22! AHHH thats in two days!! I was happy, more anxious, and alot more nervous when she said that!

welp time to get all the sleep we can get while we can!! and i have to get my bags packed!!


if you dont hear from me in the next couple days expect to see a new blog posting not long after wesley is born!!



God Bless!

stress test

Yesterday i went in for babies second stress test. At first they were concerned about my blood pressure, it was a little elevated which is uncommon for what it has been through out this pregnancy. So the set it up to check my blood pressure every five minutes. Then they noticed i was having slight contractions and during those contractions they said Baby Wesley's heart rate was slightly lowering so they wanted me to stay a little longer so that they could make sure all was well. By the time i left they said my blood pressure was lowering and that baby Wesley was okay. They also asked if i had my bags packed, i told them i had yet to do so they advised me that i should for they think Wesley may come early! So i guess that is something i better get done, although even if he comes without me having my bags packed (everything for him is ready!) we dont live far from the hospital on post so as soon as i am settled rob can always go get my things, or it could really even wait til after i have baby. Its not like im going to need anything before then! But im sure that i will make sure everything is ready so that rob doesnt have to worry about it. He has enough to worry about, like making sure family knows and being there for me and important things like that!!

My next apt is tomorrow, i believe at two twenty..i am hoping they will check to see if i am at all dilated, along with the norm- checking my blood pressure and looking over my sugars and listening to little bears heart and measuring my belly. And i would see how much longer they feel it will be til baby Wesley is here, not that they will know for sure or really be able to say. Im just anxious and want my baby boy!! lol.

Well, time to go get some stuff done. just thought id give a quick little thing about how my apt went yesterday!


God bless!!