the up side

so i seem to be losing contact with people close to me. i know there isnt much i can do about it, because i have tried. and one can only try so much before its they just give up. see the thing is, i have trust issues..i always have, maybe it has something to do with my past or maybe its just who i am...but to me it seems like every time i really start to open up to someone and trust them to they leave.. i was a little down last night and had a talk with the husband, and he told me not to worry because no matter how many people leave, he will always be there! and i know hes right because hes been there in the past, so of course he'll be there now! he told me not to dwell over something that i have no control over, which i guess hes right! but ill still be here for them, if/when they need me, because thats who i am..and i love helping people!  but like i said before, there is so only so much one can do! i dont know what i would do with out my husband, he always knows what to say and when to say it, im so lucky to have him!


on the up side, i am loving my new job, the extra money will be nice. we are hoping to start saving a little from each check to have "ohio money" and just in case money(i mean you never know what could happen!)! we are also going to start putting extra change in a jar for our "ohio money" not sure when we will go home for a visit, but its better to have money saved up for when we do! and i cant wait til we do, we have talked about it a little more recently but havent decided when we would go home for a week or so. im glad i got a job when i did because now we have money for the extra little things we need, yes it would have been nice to have it months ago, but hey i have it now so i cant complain!. ahh speaking of my new job, i work in a nursery at the athletic club and i thought that working there with all the little kids (we can only have 20 at a time, ages 6weeks -6years) well i thought it would cure my baby fever but i swear its only making it worse! we had the tiniest adorable little three month old baby girl in there, she was fussy for the other workers but when i help her she was fine and fell right to sleep, oh my lanta! she was the cutest little thing! im really enjoying working there! its such a blast! working with kids has always been something i really enjoy doing! im happy with where things are at/going in life right now! to me it seems like things are finally looking up and can only go further up from here! (:


"being happy doesnt mean everything is perfect, it means youve decided to look beyond the imperfections"